Cordialement

This post has been kept on draft for days. I haven't got the foggiest idea of how to write without feeling a little shiver while also experiencing 15 minutes of writer's block to even complete this sentence. My mind is muddling. I shouldn't have bothered, honestly.  

"I don't know if I will still be here next year. I might stay in Brussels, move back to Copenhagen, or maybe move to London. I fucked this up and I'm so sorry... I hope you'll feel good again soon, and be able to forget me." he said while burying his face in his hands and sobbing. 

And minutes later, munching on his stupid Super Piratos I bought from 7/ELEVEn near Kongens Nytorv. At least something he enjoyed while weeping out of this chaos.

After two weeks he left me out of the closure, I should have comprehended. To him, I wasn't worth a single text. I finally realized that his silence was too loud that it vocalized elucidation. He knows exactly that I have closed my door, but it was never locked. Yet, he never tried to even reach the knob. 

"You deserve someone better." 

I do. And he doesn't have to tell me twice. I know I do. 

I thought I was lost in him, but I just didn't expect in this way. I was just mad at myself for playing blind. I was mad that he cared about my presence, but not me. I was mad that I fell for his potential, leaving my expectations unmet. Well, hindsight is always 20/20.

But he brought me on a new journey to love myself. Just like his ego always does to himself. 

I just hope he shortly finds a woman that I won't be. Hope she doesn't sleep in his white T-shirt and black long socks like I did. Hope she likes cilantro as much as he does. I just wish he'd be happy, and I won't hear a single thing about it.